Guide · Invitation etiquette

What does RSVP stand for? RSVP meaning and how to reply

RSVP is on almost every invitation, yet many guests are not sure whether it means “reply if you are coming” or “reply either way”. Here is what it stands for, how to answer, and how hosts can ask for replies without chasing anyone.

RSVP meaning: what the letters stand for

RSVP stands for the French phrase “répondez s’il vous plaît”, which means “please reply” or, word for word, “reply if you please”. On an invitation, RSVP asks you to tell the host whether you will attend, usually by a set date.

The important part is that RSVP asks for an answer either way. It does not mean “reply only if you are coming”. If you cannot attend, you still let the host know.

Stands forRépondez s’il vous plaît
LanguageFrench
MeansPlease reply
Pronouncedar-ess-vee-pee (each letter said separately)
Asks you toTell the host yes or no, by the date given

Where RSVP comes from

French was the language of polite society and diplomacy across Europe in the eighteenth and nineteenth centuries, and English-speaking hosts borrowed many of its etiquette phrases. RSVP has appeared on English invitations since at least the mid-1800s, and the abbreviation stayed long after the rest of the French fell away.

Today French speakers themselves often write “RSVP” too, but the phrase is just as likely to be replaced by plain wording such as “merci de confirmer votre présence”. In English, RSVP is now so familiar that it is also used as a verb: “Have you RSVPed yet?”

What RSVP means on an invitation

Hosts write RSVP in a few different ways. Each one asks for something slightly different:

Invitation saysWhat it means
RSVPPlease tell the host whether you are coming. Reply yes or no.
RSVP by June 1Reply yes or no before that date, so the host can confirm numbers.
Kindly reply / The favour of a reply is requestedA formal way of saying RSVP. Same meaning.
Regrets onlyReply only if you cannot attend. If you say nothing, the host expects you.
RSVP to Sarah by textReply to that person, in that way, not to whoever sent the invitation.
RSVP online / Reply via the linkUse the website or personal link on the invitation to answer.

Some invitations also ask how many people are coming or about dietary needs. Answer those questions too: they are how the host plans seating, food and drinks.

How to RSVP, step by step

  1. Check the deadline. Reply as soon as you know, and always before the “RSVP by” date.
  2. Use the method the host asked for: the reply card, a phone call, a text, an email or an online RSVP link.
  3. Say clearly whether you will attend. A short “yes” or “no” is enough; you do not need to explain why you cannot come.
  4. Give the number of people coming, but only count the people named on the invitation. Do not add a partner, a friend or children unless the invitation includes them.
  5. Mention dietary needs or allergies if the host asks for them.
  6. If your plans change, tell the host straight away, especially if you said yes.

On an online invitation, these steps usually take a few seconds: you open your personal link, choose whether you are attending, add a plus-one if the host allows one and any dietary needs, and send.

RSVP examples: how to accept or decline

Short, warm and clear is all a reply needs. You can adapt these examples for a reply card, a text or an email.

Accepting a wedding invitation
Thank you so much for inviting us. Maria and I are delighted to accept and look forward to celebrating with you on June 14.
Declining a wedding invitation
Thank you for the lovely invitation. Unfortunately we are unable to attend, but we will be thinking of you both and wish you a wonderful day.
Accepting a party invitation by text
Thanks for the invite! I’ll be there on Saturday, just me. Can’t wait.
Declining a party invitation by text
Thank you for thinking of me! I’m away that weekend, so I can’t make it. Have a brilliant time.
Accepting a business event
Thank you for the invitation to the annual dinner on November 20. I am pleased to confirm my attendance. I am vegetarian, if that is helpful for catering.
Changing your answer
I’m so sorry, something has come up and I can no longer attend on Saturday. I wanted to let you know as soon as possible.

What does “regrets only” mean?

“Regrets only” means you only need to reply if you cannot attend. If you are coming, you do not need to answer: the host will count you in. It is common for casual gatherings, open houses and office parties, where an exact headcount matters less.

With a plain RSVP, the host expects to hear from everyone. With regrets only, silence means yes. When in doubt, a quick reply is always polite.

RSVP etiquette for guests

  • Reply within a few days of receiving the invitation, even if the deadline is weeks away.
  • Answer even when the answer is no. Silence leaves the host guessing and paying for an empty seat.
  • A yes is a commitment. If you must cancel, tell the host as early as you can.
  • Do not bring guests who were not invited, and do not ask to bring one unless the invitation says “and guest”.
  • If you miss the deadline, contact the host directly, apologise and ask whether it is still possible to come.
  • Do not reply on social media or in a group chat unless the host asked you to.

For hosts: how to ask guests to RSVP

A clear request gets more replies. Say how to reply and by when, and ask only for the information you will use.

  • Set the deadline 3 to 4 weeks before a wedding, and about 1 week before a party, so you have time to confirm numbers with the caterer or venue.
  • Write the date, not just “soon”: “Kindly reply by May 10.”
  • Make replying easy. A personal RSVP link is quicker for guests than posting a card.
  • Say who is invited. Naming each guest, and saying clearly whether a plus-one is included, avoids surprises.
  • Ask about dietary needs in the same reply, so you do not need a second round of messages.
  • A few days before the deadline, contact the guests who have not answered.
Formal wording
The favour of a reply is requested by the first of May.
Simple wording
Please RSVP by May 1.
Friendly wording
Let us know if you can make it by May 1!
Online wording
Kindly reply by May 1 using your personal link.

RSVP in other languages

RSVP is understood in many countries, but invitations in other languages often use their own phrase:

LanguageOn an invitationMeaning
FrenchRSVP, or merci de confirmer votre présencePlease reply / please confirm you are coming
SpanishS.R.C. (se ruega contestación), or favor de confirmar asistenciaA reply is requested / please confirm attendance
PortugueseRSVP, or confirme sua presençaPlease confirm you are coming
Germanu. A. w. g. (um Antwort wird gebeten)A reply is requested
Arabicيرجى تأكيد الحضورPlease confirm attendance

RSVP questions

Do you have to RSVP if you are not going?

Yes. Unless the invitation says “regrets only”, RSVP asks for a reply either way, so let the host know you cannot attend.

Is it rude not to RSVP?

Yes. Not replying leaves the host unable to plan food, seating and costs. A short reply, even a no, is always appreciated.

Is “please RSVP” correct?

Strictly, it repeats itself, because RSVP already contains “please”. But “please RSVP” is so common that it is accepted almost everywhere.

How do you pronounce RSVP?

Say each letter: ar-ess-vee-pee.

What does RSVP mean in a text message?

The same as on an invitation: the sender is asking you to reply and say whether you are coming.

What should I do if I missed the RSVP deadline?

Contact the host directly as soon as possible, apologise and ask whether there is still room. Do not simply turn up.

Can I bring a plus-one?

Only if the invitation includes one, for example “and guest”, or the host offers. If you are unsure, ask the host before you reply.

What is the difference between a save the date and an RSVP?

A save the date announces the date early and does not need a reply. The invitation that follows has the full details and the RSVP request.

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